THE BAG OF TRICKS

Was there ever anything so necessary as a woman’s purse?

In Victorian times women had a tiny little pouch containing a fancy handkerchief and very little else but, as they seldom went anywhere without an escort, they needed no additional clutter. A ladies maid would always be on hand to retrieve anything else that was necessary. Trips to the dressmaker or for other decorative items were put “on account” so no money was needed.

Skip forward a few generations and every woman you saw was toting a purse. As the years progressed it seems that purses got larger as there was more to carry around. A woman’s purse can weigh several pounds which really takes its toll on the shoulder that hauls it around all day. An average purse contains a large wallet, which in itself is a hefty item, change purse, phone, tissues, date book, make-up, comb, glasses, small notebook and pens and a bottle of water. These are the day to day necessities.

Queen Elizabeth never goes anywhere without her purse over her arm. She probably only has a lace hanky but the purse is as much the part of her outfit as her hat.

There seems to be something sacred about a purse. Very seldom we need to write a cheque and the chequebook is in my purse. Dave will ask for one and I tell him to get one out of my purse. Instead of getting a cheque, the whole purse is carried to me and I have to get the required item. We have been married for almost fifty four years and he will still not open my purse. I think he may suspect I have a leg-hold trap in there to catch unsuspecting fingers.

When we go out my purse goes too. Dave grabs his wallet, water bottle, car keys and reading glasses. He doesn’t like to carry his wallet in his pocket while he is driving so he puts in on the cup holder, which is located between us in the car. Reading glasses go in shirt pocket, if he has a pocket. Both these items eventually find their way into my purse as do any small purchases he acquires.

I don’t know why but men hate to be seen holding a woman’s purse. Go into any department store and you will see at least one man holding a purse while his partner tries on clothing. A woman holds a purse close to her body but a man holds it in the same way he would hold a dirty diaper, at arms length and pretending he doesn’t know what it is. Do men automatically think they are perceived as gay if they are holding a purse? Man-purses never caught on but they are as necessary for a guy as a gal, so why not. A brief case or camera bag is OK, so is a backpack but a plain leather bag is to be avoided at all costs.

I don’t know about other men but it is not just purses with my husband. When we were courting we would quite often spend so much time over our goodnight kisses that Dave would miss the last bus home and he had to walk. On one occasion it was raining hard so I lent him my umbrella, which was a rather fancy affair but it kept him dry on his walk home. The next evening when he came to meet me he was carrying the umbrella wrapped up in newspaper!

When we got married and babies came along I did lots of knitting. Funds were short and our local wool shop would hold the required amount of wool and just let you pay for one ball at a time. On one occasion I asked Dave to pick up a ball for me and he came back with it stuffed under his sweater and refusing to ever go again. The shopkeeper used pink and white striped, paper bags to put purchases in and Dave thought that the bags represented underwear or feminine hygiene products.

Over the years he got a little easier about picking up women’s supplies from supermarkets but to this day he is horrified if I ask him to hold my purse.