A SIMPLE MERRY CHRISTMAS
For many years I found Christmas to be a really stressful time, not in the mood to be festive because I spend too much time worrying if I would get everything done in time.
Trying to find suitable gifts for an ever expanding family as each of the girls found partners, had children of their own and brought in-laws on to the scene.  Dave’s siblings also married had children and then grandchildren.
Where does it stop, where do you draw the line?  I would feel that I had completed the gift list when another in-law would drop by with a gift, it never seemed to end and it all seemed to be my responsibility to get the perfect balance between over indulgence and looking cheap.
I have written about this subject several times but around twelve years ago one of our daughters, who was heavily into drugs, suffered terrific spousal abuse and finished up with a broken back, broken arms and serious internal injuries, she was to spend the next few months flat on her back in a clam shell cast.
Her drug use had taken her away from the family circle as she was ashamed of her life style and found it easier not to deal with us or her sisters.  Her drug dealer partner was not welcome in our home so our daughter would not come either. Her two young children were taken from her and were under their father’s care.  It was a very sad situation and Dave and I were distraught.  I constantly prayed for guidance but no answer seemed to come.
The awful abuse was the answer, a blessing in disguise, as her time in hospital got her out of the drug habit, she was amazed that her parents and sisters loved her unconditionally and wanted her back in the family circle.  She spent two years living with her elder sister until she was well enough to get back to work and in to her own place.  She eventually got her children back and was in a good place.
As Christmas approached that year I told my family that I did not want any gifts, instead I wanted donations made to the Women’s Shelter as I knew that many abused women did not have a loving family to support them and they needed help badly.
The whole family decided that we all were blessed with more than enough and every adult decided to have donations made instead of gifts.  Grandchildren still got their gifts of course but all adults stopped the mad chase of finding gifts for family members.  One of the girls came up with the idea of each household making two pages of their family photos, activities throughout the year.  Each one of us made an identical set for each of the other households and, as the photos were already arranged on pages, they just needed to be slipped in our albums.
Most of the grandchildren are old enough now to enjoy some money which they can spend on anything they like so I do not need to do the hunt for presents except for the youngest two.
I now scoot through the festive season with a light heart and no shopping list.  No more the pushing and shoving to find the right gift for anyone, no couple of days standing wrapping the mountain of boxes and writing out tags.  Instead we write a cheque to our favourite charity and let the money help those who really need it.
Christmas should be a time of loving and giving but how much better to give to those who need it and, if this means less work for me, then that is a perfect gift to myself.  There is now a peaceful, joyful place in my life where the stress used to be and I can really appreciate the true meaning of Christmas.
May the true blessings of Christmas be yours, every day of the year.