What is it about going to a foreign country that causes us to lose our usual sense of modesty and decorum? Recently Dave and I, with a couple of friends flew to Mexico for a couple of weeks of fun in the sun.
December is always a busy time in the catering business and January and February are usually slow, so this is a good time to fly south for a couple of weeks of warm weather, perfect for escaping the cold weather and the winter ‘blahs’.
We have tried various places and visited many different countries but for a short change of pace, Mexico is cheap and cheerful and only a five hour flight away. It does not involve stopovers to change planes so you can board your plane after breakfast and be swimming before dinner.
Many resorts in Mexico are all-inclusive, meaning that all food, alcohol and entertainment is included so everything is paid up front. You only need to take money for shopping and tips. The minimum wage in Mexico is around $7.00 per DAY, so a couple of dollars left for a tip is very warmly received and ensures that waiters make sure they seat you at one of their tables and do their very best to please.
A daily US dollar left under the pillow ensures clean towels are folded into animal shapes and bedcovers are folded into flowers. Sheets are changed daily and it is such a joy to slip between cool, clean sheets every night. It would be wonderful to have this sort of treatment every day of the year, but the only maid in our Oliver home is me so a daily change of bedding is just a pipe dream.
We found a really nice resort seven years ago and return there every winter for two weeks of total relaxation, returning home with renewed energy after spending a couple of weeks swimming, reading and generally enjoying doing very little.
Friends are sometimes horrified that we would venture to a ‘dangerous’ country like Mexico but we have found the people happy and friendly. If you were to go into night clubs and bars in the middle of the city, late at night, then you may find a different atmosphere from the laid back attitude we have experienced, but surely the same can be said of Kelowna or Vancouver. If you look for trouble, you will probably not be disappointed.
Something about going to a foreign resort seems to make people lose their inhibitions, wherever you look there seems to be overweight people wearing very little. Why do very large women think that because a swimsuit is difficult to struggle into then a bikini, that lets all the extra pounds hang out, is a good substitute? I have never seen so many spare tires, except in a tire shop, rolls of flab being baked a healthy looking brown, are still rolls of flab. Men with large stomachs hanging over their swim suits strut around like Greek gods. The truth is that the only god they look like is Budha!
There is a woman sitting across the pool from us who is wearing a bikini with the bra straps taken off her shoulders. She is a large gal so every time she adjusts her chaise or bends over we expect to get a full view of what nature gave her. The activity keeps Dave awake and hopeful. While he is ogling her, a young girl in a thong bikini walks behind him and he misses the action. I feel no compulsion to draw his attention to the cute little naked bum that he is missing!
The restaurants demand that swim suits be covered so most people wear a crocheted cover up that doesn’t really cover much. It really is a very easy life to be so casually dressed and it doesn’t take long to get into the swing of things and feel comfortable strutting around half naked. I have no worries about pouring my large frame into a swimsuit, but it has to be a one piece that keeps all the flab contained.
The fabric used in swimwear is really a miracle product, whatever you pour into it looks much better contained within it’s prettily patterned interior. It has the most amazing strength but is so very comfortable even though it is containing a large volume of excess flab. How can anything that weighs just a couple of ounces be so strong? If they used it instead of paint, to cover cars, the bodywork would never show dents or scratches.
Life is so easy for this two weeks of the year, little thought needs to be given to the contents of our suitcases, shorts, swimsuits and a few lightweight tops are really all that is needed in the way of clothing. A lightweight dress and a pair of sandals is enough for dressing for dinner. We always pack a couple of books but there is always a large variety of reading at the book swap, by the pool towel counter, so always something to read.
Such an easy vacation, no need to stress about where to go for dinner, food is always on hand, there are miles of golden sand to walk on and it is only about twenty minutes to walk into the local village. Here are many local vendors with home made goods, in fact quite often they sit making the stuff while you are there. Lots of commercially crafted things as well and the vendors always expect you to haggle over the price.
Access to the busy city of Puerto Vallarta is a forty minute bus ride and the bus journey is always fun. There is usually a local who will board the bus with oranges, candy, large bouquets of exotic flowers or some other article for sale. Buses are privately owned, but under the jurisdiction of a local authority so they all cost the same fare but differ greatly in the age of the bus. One bus may have all the trappings of a luxury tour bus but the next one may look as though it has rolled down a hill, has many cracked windows and huge dents in the bodywork. Most of the drivers have the windshield covered in family photos, religious icons and always a crucifix dangling from the rear view mirror.
All the Mexicans we have met seem to be pleasant, easy going and very clean and tidy. Most women have their hair pulled into a neat bun and they are usually very pretty. Roll on next year when we can once more hang it all out in the sun.