by Penelope Johnson
The most wonderful time of the year? Not always. Jolly, merry and bright? Not everyone. For some, the noise and bustle of the Christmas season simply adds to the burden of stress, anxiety, grief, loneliness, anger, or depression. Sometimes Christmas time reawakens painful memories: as recent as the death of a loved one or as distant as traumatic childhood memories. The turn of the year may cause worries about the coming year: political, financial, or relational. Some feel powerless to change a situation: illness, injustice, unemployment, or personal conflicts. The expectation that we “must” be happy at holiday time can cause feelings of frustration or guilt. Particularly at the darkest time of year, it can be difficult to feel light-hearted.
For over a decade, a group of local churches has understood and acknowledged the heartaches and disconnection that can be felt at this season. Together with the Desert Valley Hospice Society, Oliver churches have provided a comforting alternative to holly-jolly Christmas services: the Blue Christmas service. The quiet candlelight event is held traditionally on the longest night, which this year falls on Wednesday December 21.
The service is open to anyone who would welcome a quiet, reflective time during which there is no need to pretend that all is “just fine” in their life. There is no pressure to connect with a church, no agenda, and no expectation that visitors hold particular beliefs. The service is simply a gift. Visitors can expect to hear quiet classical guitar, listen to comforting readings, find solace in a hopeful message, sing along to gentle carols, and experience calm in the flickering candlelight. There is also an opportunity to take part in a ritual of “unburdening”, by placing a stone symbolic of one’s pain in a basket and lighting a candle of hope. After the service, people are welcome to linger in the candlelight and enjoy some soothing music. Light refreshments are served downstairs for those seeking a more social gathering.
The organizers encourage people to invite and accompany a friend or loved one who may be reluctant to go alone. Committee member Brita Park explains: “Even if we aren’t ourselves burdened by holiday pressures, we can come to Blue Christmas as companions or advocates of people who are.”
The Blue Christmas service is held on Wednesday December 21 at 7 pm, at the Oliver Lutheran Centre, a white clapboard church located near the corner of Okanagan St. and Veterans Ave (three blocks west of Oliver Cinema, and half a block north on Okanagan). The Blue Christmas committee acknowledges the support of Desert Valley Hospice and local churches, and the sponsorship of Nunes-Pottinger Funeral Service.