Time gentlemen please……….this was the phrase used by English publicans, when they wanted to close the bar and go home. They used to warn customers a half hour before closing, by calling out “last orders”.
There were always a few drinkers who were not in a hurry to go home so they would buy a couple of drinks at “last orders” and try to stretch out their drinking time. However, publicans had strict operating rules and wanted to close up shop, so they would throw a towel over the ale pumps and shout out that it was time to go. Some pubs had an old school bell that they rang to get the attention of the dawdlers.
The situation is a little different when you are entertaining in your own home. You finished dinner ages ago, everyone has had enough to drink and most people are on to coffee. The group is comfortable and enjoying each others’ company and nobody wants to be the first to leave.
How do you signal people that it is time to leave? Sometimes I have felt like getting my nightie on, so they will get the hint, but this would be rather rude. Yawning a few times is a gentle hint, so is putting the dog out for her last bathroom break, but some people seem to want to stay for breakfast.
I love entertaining and do it quite often however, as we age, many people do not like staying out late and having to drive home in the dark, so much of my entertaining is done as a lunch, instead of a dinner.
Rules are a little different when going out for lunch. What is the proper time to go home afterwards? I am usually quite happy to let the party go on for much of the afternoon but, sometimes it seems that nobody will make the first move to go home, so everyone lingers. It is wonderful that people enjoy one another’s company and are happy to spend time together but sometimes you just feel it is time for them to go.
Strangely enough, when the first one decides to leave, everyone realizes it is time to go and there is a mass exodus. The confusion of the collection of coats and accessories takes a while then there is the collection of bodies around the door. It may seem like they are all leaving but don’t be fooled….between the doorstep and the parked cars can be the like the Bermuda Triangle, in reverse!
Instead of disappearing and driving home, the group suddenly remember all the things they forgot to tell one another during the last four or five hours. The people who came last and parked behind others are always the last to leave so others, whose cars are trapped in, join in the conversation, sometimes five or six different conversations between various groups.
Meanwhile you, as host and hostess are stood on the door step with a cold wind whistling around your uncoated body. It feels rude to go inside while the party is in full swing outdoors, so you stand there and shiver. You do not really want to get a coat as this seems to give the OK to stand there fore another half hour, so you just grin at the assembly while whispering to your spouse that you wish they would go.
When we lived in England, with small children, ours was the “go to” house as the kids were in bed early. My father was a terrible fusspot and he could stretch out a goodbye for over an hour.
Dave and I would stand on the doorstep, grinning insanely and shivering, while he dusted off the wing mirrors with a special rag. The rag was kept in a box, inside the car and the rag was put back into place before the engine was started, so the procedure was long winded.
As I said before, I love to entertain but when I have had enough, I just wish I had the nerve to shout, “time gentlemen please”.