In going through Wally’s columns I’ve had to create a folder I call “Specialty Items”. It is in that folder I store Wally’s Christmas columns, jokes ( all one of them so far ), and other articles he wrote or had set aside.

The column I’ve chosen is the one Wally wrote December 24, 1959 and is entitled “Letter To Santa.”

Dear Santa:

When you check your list
For gifts at Christmas time
Please don’t forget the orchardist
Who hasn’t got a dime.

It isn’t much I ask of you
(I hope it’s not a sin)
Give me just enough bloom to do,
So I’ll not have to thin.

And then, of course it would be nice
To have insecticide
That kills all bugs and mites and mice—
These I never could abide.

For irrigation I would like
(It is my fond desire)
Self-moving style of sprinkler pipe,
(With these I’ll never tire).

And when it comes to harvest time
There’s nothing I’d like better
Than a picking machine—Oh how divine!
(I hope you get this letter).

For grades and sizes I would take
All extra fancy, medium size,
Cee grade is just a big mistake
That only Ian Greenwood* buys.

And substitutes—I’d like a few,
They help smooth out the rocky way,
And tariffs help a little, too,
To make fruit growing pay.

But if this load is too much strain
For your 12 deerpower glider,
The thing I’ll need to ease the pain
Is a case of apple cider.**
*I tried to find out who Ian Greenwood was. From what I gleaned, it appears that he had something to do with the canneries.

I am open to change that assumption if anyone has a different story.

**Wally was a teetotaler, which leads me to believe that this poem was one someone else wrote or he was just writing tongue in cheek.

Merry Christmas everyone.

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